Heart
I miss out on a lot of things due to my focus on music. I work constantly, but have found the road to begin to grow lonely and cold. What's the point of making it successfully if there's no one to really share it with. I tell my friends when it all works out, then I'll be free to actually be around. I'm nice so people put up with it, but I'm wondering how to balance out my career, jobs, and my life.
That's why I work so hard to find work as an engineer or artist. If my 9 to 5 is music, I won't have to spend my 5 to 11 doing it. I can do other things- like have healthy relationships, and actually go out and not sit around with headphones on tweaking tracks that need to be mixed.
I'm in a weird place, but with continual growth and I hope I make the 'right' decisions as I get older. Will all be for naught? Can a passion as strong as mine not have some physical repercussion in the form of what I deem to be success?
It may faulty to think my life will be magically aligned upon winning a Grammy, but maybe that's all I want, but why?
We must realize our worth before we actualize it, otherwise you're running in the shadow of a circle.
My life has been a happily solitary one. I feel as though proper employment in the musical field will set many things in motion for myself. Time to live, and excitement everyday.
I interned at a studio- unpaid and was there at least 10-12 hours a day and never feeling tired until I got home and was about to fall asleep, and was energized and excited to go in as soon as I woke up the next morning. I've tasted my passion viscerally and I can't lose sight of that.
My own music is very artsy. The vibration it is- just isn't very earthly, so I'm working with other artists, bringing their visions to life, and helping them sound the best they can. Upon that foundation of assistance and business I plan to drop my album in a couple of years. That way the uniqueness that is me won't be as foreign. So, you'll be seeing me a lot in videos and stuff like Pharrell in the 90's, but it's because I produced the music you're listening to, and then I will drop my own solo project. It'll be awesome and World Roy will usher in effort and we meditate that it will be received with open ears and understanding...and if not we hope you just dance your butt off.
I'm still figuring out myself and my creative potentials. I'm still trying to find true love. I'm trying to figure out if I'm meant to help and fix people as that's a reoccurring theme in my life.
I have the brain to do anything, and that's what makes it hard to decide on something in general. I'm never really bad at anything,and if I am I can learn and adjust quickly- but if I was limited my path would be clearer. I've wasted time examining choice and not listening to my heart.
Music is a passion. Art is a passion. Maybe I will change and go to grad school and get a masters (which sounds like a good idea, because I can use the other time to get music dreams off the ground), but it's still a process.
I guess all I really know I want as of now is to make music, be around music, help people, and be stress free...and be married to the woman that fits me like a perfectly laid bass-line on some drums.
I'll be preparing to shine my abilities and not be shy with what I've been blessed with. My gifts are gifts to share and if that is so the power that comes with it will be used for love and positivity.
I wish to always reflect self empowerment and a path to a more preferred you.